TELLUMIND JOURNAL · FERTILITY JOURNEY SUPPORT
Illustrative scenario: Nia rehearsed the conversation in the elevator. She needed flexibility for monitoring appointments that were early, frequent, and occasionally rescheduled. She did not want to explain her diagnosis, treatment history, medication, prognosis, relationship, or the opinion of the coworker who considered herself the office’s volunteer fertility consultant.
Fertility care can affect emotional wellbeing, relationships, finances, and daily logistics. Current guidance emphasizes people-centered care and access to psychosocial support across the journey (WHO, 2025; European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology [ESHRE], 2015). At work, the practical goal is often narrower: communicate the job-related need while preserving appropriate privacy.
Prepare the request before sharing the story
Begin with the work impact. What timing, frequency, or unpredictability creates the problem? What arrangement might help: a flexible start, a longer lunch, remote work where feasible, schedule swaps, intermittent leave, or advance notice when possible? Which responsibilities will still be covered, and what cannot be predicted yet?
You might say: “I am receiving time-sensitive medical care that may require several early appointments over the next month. I would like to discuss a temporary flexible start and how I can keep priorities covered.” This communicates a legitimate need without offering details you do not wish to share.
Use the P.R.I.V.A.T.E. plan
- Purpose: Identify the workplace problem you need to solve.
- Request: Propose a specific, time-limited arrangement when possible.
- Information: Share only what is required for the process you are using.
- Verify: Review the handbook, benefits, leave process, and appropriate contact.
- Accountability: Explain how essential work will be communicated or covered.
- Timeline: Set a date to revisit the arrangement.
- Exit line: Prepare a sentence for questions you do not want to answer.
An exit line can be warm and firm: “I appreciate your concern. I am keeping the medical details private, but I will communicate what affects the schedule.” Privacy is not dishonesty. It is a boundary around personal information.
Managers should listen, avoid diagnostic questions, explain the correct process, protect confidentiality, and involve HR or another designated resource when appropriate. They should not promise an arrangement they lack authority to approve. Employees should seek qualified legal or benefits guidance for questions about rights, leave, insurance, or accommodations, because rules vary by employer and location.
Tellumind provides educational communication tools, not legal or medical advice. Write your request, your coverage plan, and your exit line before the conversation. You do not owe the workplace your entire fertility story in order to ask for a workable process.
References
- European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology. (2015). Routine psychosocial care in infertility and medically assisted reproduction: A guide for fertility staff. https://www.eshre.eu/Guidelines-and-Legal/Guidelines/Psychosocial-care-guideline
- World Health Organization. (2025). Guideline for the prevention, diagnosis and treatment of infertility. https://www.who.int/publications/i/item/9789240115774
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